I, thank God, do not work in a traditional corporate environment. I do not have to, as described in the movie Office Space, "...sit in little cubicles staring at computer screens all day...filling out useless forms...and listening to eight different bosses drone on about mission statements." I do however work for an organization, which means just like those of you in corporate America, I have to deal with assholes & their asshole behavior. Academics could be the biggest assholes of all. I have come to the conclusion this week that most professors are completely out of touch with reality for one of two reasons:
1) They are 800 years old and can't be in touch with reality.
2) They are in denial about reality and wish it could be like back when they were young in 1856.
The absolute worst part of the work day, for anyone, I believe are the litany of mass e-mails that are sent about absolutely nothing. Some jerk comes up with what he/she thinks is a great idea that needs to be shared with everyone, or some jerk has something to tell someone but decides that everyone must know. I had a question for our Dean the other day, and to get the answer I did something revolutionary. Something that no one would have thought to do. Something that will be written about in business communication textbooks some day. I picked up a phone and called him. 25 seconds later my question was answered.
As I sat at my desk today, that resides in an office thank you very much, I received another mass e-mail. The fact that it was a mass e-mail annoyed me, what was written in the first line got my blood boiling. The opening read: "Dear Colleagues, Sorry to clutter your in-box..." You're sorry to clutter my inbox? Then don't! I decided I only had one course of action. That's right. A "reply to all" response. Below is that response.
Everyone,
If I only had a dollar for every mass e-mail I have received over the years that began with some form of "I really hate sending mass e-mails but...." by now I'd be able to buy the Yankees away from the bumbling Steinbrenner brothers.
I'm really not interested in being part of some passive/aggressive e-mail war, so please leave me off the distribution list. Thank you.
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